Good Karma Or Bad Karma?

So what can these silly little quizzes tell me today? I thought one about my karma might be interesting, since I am always curious about Karma.

You Have Good Karma

In general, you like to do the right thing when it comes to others. Your caring personality really shines through. Sure, you have your moments of weakness - and occasionally act out. But, all in all, you're karma is good... even with those few dark spots.

How's Your Karma?

Could of fooled me. For a person with such bad luck, how could I possibly have good karma?

I've been reading a new book, The Mermaid Chair by Sue Monk Kidd - a rather good book. I've only made it to Chapter 5 so far, but i've had so much on my mind lately that I find I have to go back and re-read what I've already read just to take in what I missed the first time around. Grrr it gets to be frustrating. My Point: Don't try to read when You can't focus. LOL.

This morning I woke up, after a very fruitful sleep I might add, and went to check on my little African dwarf frog since I've been having such a hard time with him and I searched and searched my tank but did not see him any place. Finally i looked up and he was floating on the surface of the water. :( I thought "oh no, he died" . Was terribly sad and opened the top of my tank, grabbed my net cause certainly didn't want a dead frog floating around in there to put any poisons into the water or anything.. and lo' and behold and little thing started dashing about all full of energy and pep. hehe made me a very happy person.
Been watching him since and he's been darting around in there all happily. I hope happily anyway. I cetainly cannot tell his mood, but he sure is active and seems happy.
Tomorrow I will stop and try to find frozen blood worms or something similar for him to eat. The freeze dried stuff just floats on top, like he was doing and he won't eat that stuff. Yesterday I stuck some shrimp in his little hide out and turned out all the lights, so maybe he finally had a meal. *crosses fingers*

Enough for now

Love and Light ~
embrisa/pamela.

The Day

It was a pretty normal day today. Nothing too exciting did or did not happen, though we did get our first rain today and brrr was it a cold one. I actually miss the rain. With our long winters here in Colorado, when the rains come again it is nice to open up the doors and just breath in the nice clean scent that only the rain can bring.

I got my own laptop back a few days ago from the Toshiba warranty center. If anybody is ever pondering to buy a Toshiba, please do not do it. They are total trash computers and not worth the money of their parts I don't think. The time my computer spent at the warranty center being fixed I used my roommates Dell Laptop and it is like a dream come true compared to this Toshiba. There are sooo many reasons, but I won't waste the space even getting into that. Just take my word for it, If you want a nice laptop, buy a Dell. At least they work decently and hey, you can even hear sounds properly - something you cannot do with a Toshiba. booo.

Tonight we were discussing the new Pope. Seems most people are rather blown away by the fact that he is German. Also, myself included, feel that he does not actually look .. hmm a good word for it, honest. He has a certain look to him, a deceptive look. Maybe it was just the group I was discussing it with but it seemed just about everybody felt the same way about him. Out of 8 people, 2 people actually disagreed with us. Interesting.
I will have to read around the web some to see how others feel about him.

Well that is all I have to say for now. It is time to go curl up and try to see about getting some real sleep.

embrisa/pamela.

This is Not Orange?

This was my first attempt at playing with a collage of any sort and I thought, wow... well orange is supposed to make you feel GOOD! So lets try some orange. LOL. I think i slightly over did it a bit with the orange. In fact, I don't even think it IS orange, but some puky blood red maybe? Also when the program shrunk it down to post it, ewww... don't i look horrible. Oh well, what can I say... but close your eyes!


Me In Orange~ Yummy.

Always in love and and RED,
embrisa/pamela.

Yahoo and Me.

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What We Have Discoverd About Me So Far

As of Today, April 18th 2005 The things we (I) have discovered about myself (Pamela) through silly online quizzes, some which may be true and some which may not be true include:

1. That I should be a "Buddist", If I am not one already.
2. That my inner European is "Dutch". Not bad since my mummy was Dutch.
3. That my Seduction style is "Natural" LOL.
4. My Personality Disorder is a bit "Dependent" :)
5. My Irish Name is "Eva O'Leary" Hah. Gotta Love it.
6. That my Element is "Water" .
7. That my Sign of Affection is a "Cuddle and a Kiss On the Forehead".
8. That I am an "Intelligent Loner" .
9. And Last but not least, I am most like the Greek God "Nemesis" :)

So that is who I am so far, according to the online quizzes. :) Some I knew, some I just never would of guessed. hehehe. oh boy.

Update: I wrote Lano's mother the Thank You note. Don't know if she will get it. Don't know if she will read it or even pass the thank you along to Lano, but hey, I tried.

In the end, when I was calling and asking for Lano, she was not passing my calls on to Lano and telling him that I called. The only way he would find out is if he would contact me and I'd say well I tried to call You last weekend or whatever and your mother said she would tell you. Then we would both find out at that time that no message was ever passed along to him. Oh well, if it was not meant to be, then it was not meant to be. There is nothing I nor anybody else can do to change the course of the future.

Everyday, Every hour, I still miss him dearly in my life. I wish more than anything that he would get his act together. That he would quit drinking. Quit abusing pills. Quit abusing Himself and realize there is somebody in this world that loves Him a whole lot and needs him.

But alas, he used to always tell me.. I do not even love myself. How can I fully love you? Or what was his other famous line? *thinks* I cannot remember now.. 6:15 am in the morning and no sleep. I am drawing a blank. But something similar.

Anyway, could of very well just of been excuses so he could get out of being with me. But somehow I doubt it. I just do not know. Men are hard to figure out. But i do know, that if he truly wanted to be with me, he would be with me. period. Nothing would hold him back. Men who are truly in love, do not hide away for months or make up silly excuses or none of that BS.

So everyday I struggle to win back my heart. But it has been no easy task. Maybe someday I shall forgot completely about him. I shall forgot all the things that we have in common. I shall forget how i crave what he craves. I shall forget it all. Maybe then he will be truly happy?

I have to go cry now.

embrisa/pamela.

I am Nemesis?

I seem to be hooked on these stupid quizzes. *runs around screaming*

This one was particularly frustrating because I do not think it is me at ALL. In fact, not even close. I even re-took the stupid test and it came up with the same answer TWICE. How can a submissive be a Nemesis? Odd.. If you ask me. But then again, nobody asked me I don't guess. Humph. Anyway, here is what it says about me. hah. Oh, and to boot, I am SHY!! Extremly shy!


nemesis
Which Of The Greek Gods Are You ??
brought to you by Quizilla
~

Okay, so lets try this one, it is kind of cute and well, interesting I suppose. What else can I say about it? LOL.

loner

What kind of girl are you? (with pix!)
brought to you by Quizilla

I like this one for some strange reason. *Looks with puppy dog eyes*


tioncuddle

What Sign of Affection Are You?
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Quizilla tests are fun, but unless You are ready to host the pics yourself, don't try to post them in your blogs because they NEVER load and make your blogs look like crapola. Just a Little FYI.

embrisa/pamela

Dark and Light Collide~

Another Crappy Morning!

Sometimes I wonder, can life get anymore worse than it already is?

The answer continiously surprises me, because YES, it can! Everyday brings new surprises to me. Not loving, bountiful surprises.. but crappy surprises that just throw me for a loop. If it is not one thing it is another. What was Murphy's Law? hmm.

• Anything that can go wrong will go wrong will go wrong.
• Left to themselves, things tend to go from bad to worse.
• Every solution breeds new problems.

Laughs - Just some things I found kind of funny, but very true about Murphy's law, that I thought I'd share.

Anyway, it is Sunday morning and I am debating making some blueberry Pancakes. Yumm. Sounds soo good on a morning like today. Or else curling back in bed sounds even better. hehe. decisions, decisions.

Last night on Yahoo, I actually decided to give a new Master a go. It was the most stupid mistake I made since the last time I tried. He seemed to have a great deal of knowledge about energy and the exchange of energy, though He did not look at it from a spiritual view like I did. He looked at it as purely sexual, which was new to me. When two people exchange energeis, to me that is spiritual.

It also helped me understand why for 5 years I could be in a relationship where the person only took and took my energy but never gave back, never danced 'in the flame' so to speak with me and because of that I became sicker and sicker. Maybe if i would of stayed on the same path, I would of died. I don't know. I mean we all have to die someday anyway, but being constantly drained by an energy vampire and never having Him fill me back up with his love, is very bad and very unhealthy, for the one who in such a position.

Love Pamela/embrisa