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Wednesday, August 24, 2005

Submission and Love



I never realized how alike submissive women think...
lately i've been reading some blogs from submissive women and it seems blog after blog, submissive women seem to love deeper, feel deeper, have nearly the same wounds etc. I never knew this till recently. I find it in some way uplifting to know there are others out there who think and feel the way i do, yet, i know it is hellish.. so i feel a deep sense of saddness for all of us in this same boat.
So often i want to write to them and tell them how they are not alone and a few survival techniques i have learned a long the way.. especially when we start questioning if God actually loves us and if so why do we suffer so deeply etc.
BUT, being in the same shoes, i understand that getting words from a stranger is not what we need.. regardless of how understanding those words may be or not.
What we do need is understanding and love from those closest to us. A simple touch. A small smile..but often so many of us do not even have that in our lives. Nobody to count on. Nobody to listen. Nobody to hold us when we need to be held.

Oh well, maybe someday I will figure it all out. I will figure out how to stop all suffering within myself. How to love just 'enough' instead of too much. How to bare witness to my suffering as a means of release.

Until later,
embrisa/pamela.
btw, i still love You Lano. :(

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