It started out pretty good. I got my beautiful tulips yesterday, though it was not my birthday yet.. but for them to deliver flowers on saturday is very expensive.. so I got them on friday instead of today. I also got a very nice tunic type blouse from a friend. It actually looked very nice, especially since I lost almost 100 lbs in the past year. I also got a pair of white lace thongs. *laughs* But not tried those on yet, so no idea how those might or might not look.
Actually, everything was great till I woke up and read my e-mails. There was an e-mail in there from Lano's mother. She said she was just writing to wish me a happy birthday for herself and Lano and Lano would of wrote himself but his computer is broke down and he has no way to get it fixed. She also said Lano thought about calling me but thought it was not appropriate since he has not been in contact with me for so long. She signed it, Regards Joy.
I found the whole letter kind of disturbing for a couple of reasons. 1st of all, they only have one computer ... so if it is broke down, how was she writing me? and number 2, same e-mail address as Lano's but just with her name. Many ISP's allow you to have more than one e-mail addy.
I really don't know what it all means, but either Lano wrote and just pretended to be his mother or had his mother write, obviously.. but why the rest of the lies, I do not know.
I guess I can understand that he wanted to at least send me birthday wishes but wanted no other contact with me and that is fine, but again, I am sick of the lies and really am not such a chump that I would prefer to be lied to and led on regarding a relationship and I've always told him such. But I guess he doesn't want to end the relationship in case sometime in the future he 'needs' pammie, he can come running, have a thousand excuses for why he was gone.. the reasons he did what he did, etc.. and expect me to forgive him like I always have.
But this time He will be in for a big surprise, because he will never get a hold of me again.
*Half A Heart*
Anyway, I was for the most part happy before I got that e-mail. Don't know why I let it affect me so much. Why I let him affect me. I know he is only a lying dog and incapable of love. He hates himself so much so how could he possibly love anybody else?
Usually I prefer reading a real book, something I can hold in my hands.. touch, feel, smell. really take in. But recently I been doing Audio books. They can be kind of interesting if you listen to them while driving or when you have absolutely nothing else to do.. but really, that is the ticket.. You have to give them 100% of your attention to fully take them in and catch most of the details and sometimes it is hard to give anything 100% of your attention
Okay, Well, Lots to do today so will write more later.
Peace and Love,
Embrisa/Pamela.
.
No comments:
Post a Comment